Desertion
by Things-YouLove
Summary: To everyone around her she's that sweet little redhead without a care in the world, but within the walls of her mind she's trapped, with no one to talk to and no other choice available Cat chooses the only option she has left, to go.
1. Go

Desertion

"Is this really what my life has become?"

The alarm rings, just another regular day at my regular school with my regular friends doing regular things, well... okay so its not so regular, in fact its probably the furthest thing from, but nevertheless, the cycle has been repeated so many f*cking times over that it all feels entirely natural to me... I feel like this is how every 17 year old girl lives her life.  
Sitting up in bed checking my phone, no new texts, no missed calls, no emails, no tweets, nothing... as usual.  
I sit there staring blankly at my phone for a good ten minutes before my instincts kick in, getting myself up out of bed walking out of my room, down the hall, hearing an ominous muttering from behind my brothers room door, I really don't even want to know what's going on in there, and quite frankly I've grown tired of caring.  
I reach the bathroom, lock the door behind me and stand before the mirror, hearing a loud CRASH coming from... you guessed it, my brothers room. I don't care.

Standing motionless in the shower, merely letting the water fall down and hit me, at least this way no one can see me cry.  
*BANG BANG BANG* three loud thuds at the door "Cat hurry up you're going to be late for school" yells my mom "and I need to use the bathroom" yells my dad, no "good morning Cat" or "how are you Cat" or "how did you sleep Cat" just straight to getting me out of the house, that's all my dad ever wants... solitude.

Fast forward me getting out of the shower, getting myself dressed, brushing my teeth and putting makeup up because lets face it, that isn't worth anyone's time let alone mine.  
Walking down the same road I've walked for three years now, never once have my parents said "Cat do you need a ride to school?" nor have my friends asked that question, or anyhing that would make the journey a little more enjoyable... I don't know, something like "do you want to walk to school together?" might help, but no, before the bell rings to signal the start of the day and after its rung for the final time and everyone begins to go home... I'm invisible.

The doors close behind me and I walk through the main lobby of the school heading straight for my locker, hearing the usual muttering among students, by lunchtime theres usually someone breakdancing or playing an instrument but in the morning everyone is just a little bit more 'normal' "Hey Cat" I'm pulled from my fortress of solitude inside my mind... or... prison more like by Tori.  
"Hi" I tell her back and before a conversation has even begun out comes her phone for her to check a text message she just received, "so Cat... how um... was your um... morning?" Tori barely manages to string a sentence together as she stares mindlessly at her phone tapping away.  
"Well, last night I didn't get to sleep until 3 in the morning" "uh-huh... so about our short film" oh, so f*ck my problems then eh? just straight to yours, "you mean, the film were Andre decided what we were going to do, Jade decided where we were going to do it, and you decided who the characters were and I made no decisions whatsoever and pretty much didn't get a word in edgewise before we were at the park and all I did was work the camera?" "Yeah that one!" she exclaims excitedly, all of my words literally flying over her head, besides the ones she wants to hear.  
"What about it?" "Well we have all the shots done we just need to cut them together, do you think you can take care of that?" by this point she isn't even looking in my direction let alone at me, her face is buried in her locker and she hasn't stopped looking at her phone since she said 'hey'  
I sigh and nod, knowing if I say no I'll first have to answer to Tori, and then to Andre, and worst of all... Jade.  
"Great, thanks Cat you're the best" she gives me a hug and walks off.

Skip forward three hours of me mindlessly clicking and staring at a screen cutting this stupid movie together, with about fifteen minutes left of lunch I'm on my way to eat at last, something I haven't yet done today as I was pretty much pushed out the door at home.  
There's no line at the truck so I can walk right up, putting my hand in my pocket to take out my money, but... oh you guessed it, I left it at home.  
With a defeated sigh and a rumble in my stomach I turn around and walk over to where my "friends" are sitting, taking my seat without saying a word using all my strength to keep it all inside.  
"So Cat, did you get it done?" Jade asks, again... no "hi Cat, how are you Cat, are you hungry Cat" just straight to your problem.  
I don't say a word instead I just throw the disk down on the table for Jade to pick up, "and its all done how I wanted right?" I nod looking up at her, "okay good"

For the remaining few minutes of lunch I sit in silence as the world passes me by, my friends talking amongst themselves, no one bothering to talk to me or ask me anything because to them I'm the child of the group, I try and say something and I'm brushed aside with something like a colouring book shoved in my face, I'm seventeen years old. what seventeen year old girl likes f*cking colouring books?  
*RIIIIING* goes the bell and my friends all begin to stand up, a nudge on my shoulder getting me from my thoughts "Cat its time to get to class" Beck tells me, Jade yelling at him to hurry up meaning he walks off before I actually have a chance to stand.  
I take a deep breath and put my hands on the table pushing myself up, turning to head back inside.  
Halfway through my step however I stop myself, my friends have all long disappeared inside and the majority of the other kids have all left too, so instead of walking back into class to let my personal hell of a so called life continue I spin on my heels and quickly beginning to walk straight through the car park and out on to the street, I pause for a minute thinking what my next move will be and it comes to me.

I walk back down the same route I walk twice a day, not stopping for anything, I feel the looks from random people as I pass them by, knowing I'm meant to be in school but beside that they don't care one bit, if I stopped and told them everything that's wrong with me and ask them to help me fix it, they'd look at me as if I were crazy.  
I get back to my house and use my key to get in, my mom and dad are both at work at this time every day so I'm not surprised, but again I don't stop, walking straight upstairs, the loud music I could hear outside getting louder and obviously coming from my brothers room, meaning he won't even know I've been home.  
With a slam of my door I look under my bed to find a bag, I lay it on the bed and look around deciding what I need to pack.

After I'm done, I leave the Cat Valentine they think they know behind, forever.


	2. Leaving It All Behind Me

"I'm leaving the girl you think you know behind me, forever"

Standing in dead silence in my room... the only sound being that of the ticking clock on the wall, staring down at the empty bag in front of me, wondering what I'm supposed to do, usually packing is just for a week or two, maybe a month... but this is like... having to pack my entire life, I mean... where the hell do I start? do I bring clothes? money? well yes I do need money, but where am I going?

Lets skip forward about an hour of me rummaging through my closest and looking over every inch of my room to find what I need. Mostly clothes with some essentials in there too, toothpaste, a toothbrush, pads; y'know... for that time, some pens (why?) and my stuffed purple giraffe, I couldn't bare the thought of leaving that behind.  
I zip the bag closed and move on to the most important bit... money.  
How much do I have? how much will I need? I have no idea as I have no idea what I'll do, hell there's even doubt in my mind as to whether or not this is good idea to begin with.  
But every time I question it, every time I think to myself "should I just forget it?" "should I just put the stuff away and go back to normal?" "its not too late to go back to school" my mind answers the questions for me with one simple answer "no" blunt, straightforward, simple to understand, its what I really want inside and I can't just be a coward again like I have been countless times in the past, not this time.

Having a look around, not only my room but every other room, I managed to scrape together near enough $2000 which I guess would be enough for... a flight?  
OH MY GOD CAT YOU'RE A GENIUS! What better way is there to leave your old life behind than by leaving the country itself?  
With the idea now firmly in my mind I wasted no time in calling for a cab to the airport, patiently waiting and thinking, not really having a plan set out yet... but having any sort of plan at all is better than just wandering the streets waiting for an answer to jump out in front me.

The sound of a horn tells me the cab is here, its time to go, with my bag in one hand and the money stuffed away safely inside it I get up off of my bed, stopping at the door just before leaving, turning to look back at where I've always considered my special place, the one place above all else I would always feel safest.  
I look over everything, the walls decorated with posters and pictures, shelves filled with stuffed animals, a desk with my computer and all the essentials I needed for school, and my bed, no matter what happened in my life I would always wind up back home in my bed, sort of the safe place within the safe place in a way, I could be alone with just inner most thoughts in bed, sure I spent a few sleepless nights there but it was my bed and I wouldn't want any other.  
With a heavy sigh and a pain in my heart I turn off the light and pull the door closed, whispering "goodbye Cat" to myself as I hurry down the stairs, locking the door and taking the key with me as I go.

The cab ride is a long, silent one, when I got in he ent over where we were going again and I told him the airport was right, he asked me where I was planning on going but not even I knew how to answer that one.  
Conveniently en route to the airport we ended up going right by my school, or my old school now, Hollywood Arts, it was now the end of the day so all the students were filing out, I felt a buzz in my pocket and checked my phone, it was a message from Tori.  
"Hey Cat, where are you? we got an A for our film! and we were gonna go get sushi to celebrate but we're waiting for you"  
I put the phone away without replying and look out the window, watching my school pass me by, "goodbye Hollywood Arts" I whisper to myself.

"Here we are" the cab driver pulls to a stop, I get out, take my bag and pay him and he leaves, so here we go... I've come this far, I could easily turn around and head home now but every time the thought so much as crosses my mind I inwardly kick myself forward, knowing its what I have to do.  
Walking through, surprisingly quiet but then again that's no surprise, in a few hours it will probably be as busy as ever.  
I don't have a ticket so I figured I may as well buy one, so I go over the desk where a woman is, greeting me with a smile, "Hi, how can I help you?" she asks, "I um... what's the next departing flight that tickets are still available for?" she turns to her computer, types away and turns back to me "there's one ticket available for a flight to London, leaving in 2 hours" PERFECT!  
Having to pay a considerable amount for the ticket, at least $700 really hit the money I have on me hard, I sat waiting for my flight watching the clock tick away, eating a sandwich and drinking a cup of coffee I had bought myself since I hadn't yet eaten today.

I was starting to get bored waiting and I saw that I still had an hour and a half left, so I took my phone out and opened up a notepad, thought for a while before beginning to type.

 _Hello, my name is Cat Valentine, by the time you read this I will be long gone and I don't want to be followed so I'll be leaving my phone right here at the airport, who knows who will pick this up, who knows if anyone will even read it, but if you do, well... congratulations I guess, for all I know it could be so long before someone reads this I may even be dead while you're reading this._

 _But anyway, before I leave my life behind there are a few people I want to send a final message to, I'm not going to send it directly to them because they barely listen to me anyway so it'll be in the spirit of how things have always been._

 _Mom, you were the first person I ever knew, the first person I ever saw when my eyes opened in the delivery room, you've been the only person that has been there for me for every single day of my life and I can not thank you enough for it, you'd help me with anything and everything I needed, I could always go to my mom, be it school problems, friend problems, boy problems, or even intimate problems you were the ear I needed to listen and the shoulder I needed to cry on, at least you were... now I feel like I don't even exist to you, I try and speak to you and you disregard it, always feigning that you're "too busy" but its okay, you're the reason I came into this world anyway, and for that, I will always love you._

 _Dad, the other half of the puzzle that made me, they say every little girl has a special connection with her dad and I am living proof that that's true, sure mom was my go to but for some things you just need your dad instead, you would always check to see if there were monsters under my bed and you'd always tell me there weren't, apart from the time you hid under there and jumped out and made me wet myself... I haven't forgiven you for that and I never will haha.  
We'd argue sure, but at the end of the day you were and always will be my dad and I was your little girl, I say was because... I'm not anymore, like mom you've just lost interest in me and I feel like I may as well be dead to you, and if this is my last message to you, well... I still love you dad._

 _Oh, my brother, where do I start with you... the most backward individual I've ever laid eyes upon and I've seen my reflection staring back at me, the very reason my hair is the color it is now, thank you for throwing that vase at me... kinda.  
When mom and dad weren't there you were my guardian, you were the one to look out for me, even if you didn't want to you did it anyway, I'd make you take me to the park or to see one of my friends and you did because you wanted to see me smile, and one night when mom and dad weren't home yet, I had never gone to bed without at least one of my parents in the house and the idea terrified me, you sat with me, read me bedtime stories and even sang a song with me, you told me "Cat, I love you, and I'd go to the ends of the earth to protect you" well, prove it._

 _Tori, ah... Tori, my best friend, at least, my best friend who doesn't yell at me all the time, I still remember the day you stole the show at the big showcase filling in for your sister, and of course the first day I saw you at school, and how could I forget the first words you said to me...  
In a way you were the sister I never had, I could come to you for anything and I mean anything, you were always the friend I could turn to in my hour of need, and we certainly had some memorable times, whether it was you kissing my boyfriend, in a way that kind of brought us closer together, or us winding up in prison in some strange foreign country, great plan on getting us out of that by the way or else we'd still be there, or that time you performed at the Platinum Music Awards, which I really loved, my bibble addiction aside, oh and of course the time you and I performed together, that will always be my most special memory I've shared with you.  
We spent countless hours together, days and nights and I grew to consider you as family Tori._

 _Jade, Yes... Jade, you might be a little backward, oh who am I kidding, you're very backward, and mean too... but if I say that you'll hit me, regardless of all of that however, I've seen the real you, I've seen that even you have kindness in your heart, and I know it kills you to admit but its true and I love it.  
You were my first true lifelong friend, I'm not quite sure how we wound up being friends in the first place but I wouldn't change it for the world.  
I guess its true, opposites attract, I guess with Tori being a sister to me you were too, but like, my older, bossy, protective sister, always sticking up for me and never letting anyone else be mean to me, only you haha.  
Sure we had a few fights, and arguments, and you may have tried to kill me a few times... I waxed off your eyebrows and you shaved my head bald, but I guess that's just how we showed our love for one another, its weird, but its true, I love you Jade._

 _Robbie, my favorite boy in the whole world, well apart from the times you want to play pirates, but we wont talk about that because its um... dirty.  
Everyone can see you've had a crush on me, even I can see it, but you never could muster up the strength to tell me exactly how you felt, sure there were VERY strong hints, I mean the way you play pirates was enough of a hint alone, but again... not going into that.  
I love everything about you, your sense of humor, your guitar playing, your personality and just every little detail that makes you, well... you.  
Maybe we would have ended up together at some point, if I hadn't just run away from you again, and who knows... maybe at some point... I love you Robbie._

 _Andre, my older brother, wise, kind, funny, always happy, I enjoyed all the time we spent together, the few times you asked me to record vocals for a song, you know... when you weren't asking Tori, it was always a pleasure to see your musical genius at work and I have full belief it will take you to wherever you want to be in life.  
You've always been a protector to me, much like Jade only in the sense that you weren't mean to me while stopping others from being mean to me, if that makes sense.  
I wish we could have spent more time together but I was always a little bit too childish, maybe later down the line our paths will cross again, I hope.  
I love you Andre._

 _Beck, hmm, what do I say about you... very similar to Andre, one of the boys who would always look out for me, and I'm sorry I left you stuck in your own RV, next time you go to the beach I won't be there so hopefully someone else like Tori will run off to use the bathroom, and have enough sense to come straight back rather than get sidetracked by boys.  
Much like with Andre's musical knowledge I loved seeing your acting and filming genius at work, whether I was in the play or movie, or just watching you, I always had a fantastic time doing so and I will always remember each and every one, I love you Beck._

 _And to anyone else... teachers, counselors, friends, acquaintances... even Trina, you have all touched my life in a way that will always hold a place in my heart, I wish I could go through each and every single one of you and tell you just how much you mean to me, yes... even Trina.  
But I have to go now, I have to leave my life behind._

 _I love you all._

I wipe the tears from my cheeks, hearing the "final boarding call" for my flight, making me stand up, I turn around and stand still for a moment, thinking through countless memories I've spent with all the people I just wrote about, yes even Trina, mentally debating with myself whether or not its really worth leaving behind, but with a heavy sigh I turn my phone off, looking down at it, a tear rolls from my cheek and falls down, splashing on the screen.  
I set the phone down on the chair I was just sitting in, look at it one last time, before I turn around, take my bag, and walk away.

"Goodbye..."


	3. Have I Made A Mistake?

**Apologies for the wait between chapters two and three, I mentioned in my other story that I had terrible problems with my laptop that sort of put everything else on hold and haven't really found that thought process to come up with a new chapter until now, conveniently after I just finished watching the latest Walking Dead episode, I won't spoil that though.**

* * *

 ***NO P.O.V***

"I wonder where she is..." Tori sighed staring at her phone for the thousandth time, still standing by her locker surrounded by her friends.

"Maybe try giving her a call again?" Andre suggested, Tori took her phone out and quickly went to her contacts, finding the name marked "Cat" with a little heart at the end, she'd hit call and put the phone to her ear, waiting, hoping for something.

"The number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable" was all Tori heard before the line went dead, she looked at her phone in disbelief to make sure she had dialed the right number, trying again and hearing the same message, "the number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable"

"Well?" Andre asked watching Tori attempt to dial twice, she looked at him confused, "it just said the number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable, it didn't ring or anything" Andre raised an eyebrow in surprise, if there's one thing he knew about Cat it's that she was never more than a few feet from her phone, and it was always on, always.

"Well, let me try maybe you're phone service is having problems" he suggested taking his own phone from his pocket, finding the name "Cat" in his contacts and putting the phone to his ear.

"The number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable"

"Same thing" he sighed putting the phone back in his pocket, meeting Tori's worried expression with a more reassuring one, "have either of you found her yet?" Jade asked sternly as she walked over with her arm around Beck's waist and his around hers in return, "no, it just keeps saying the number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable" Tori said checking her phone once more in the hope she might have got a text or a missed call from Cat, "well where the hell is she I'm hungry!" Jade yelled taking her phone out and becoming the third person to attempt to dial Cat, and the third person to receive same message.

"The number you are trying to reach is currently unavailable"

"I guess her phone is off" Beck reasoned in an attempt to calm Jade down, "Cat never turns her phone off" Tori said back with her eyes glued to her phone as she typed out yet another text message, Robbie ran over, holding his phone in his hand, "you guys... its just saying the ph-" "we know!" Jade yelled to interrupt before he could repeat the message, "did you check everywhere?" Jade asked him, "everywhere... the classrooms, the acting hall, even that little room in the attic she was living in for a while" he explained while still gasping for breath, "living in?" Tori questioned finally looking away from her phone, "shut up Vega!" Jade yelled cutting her off, "what about the bathroom?" she asked, Andre, Beck and Tori all exchanged confused glances with one another, "even the bathrooms, she's not in any of them"

"Why were you checking the girls bathrooms?" "how many times do I have to say shut up Tori? it doesn't matter where he was checking I just want him to find that stupid little red head so we can get out of here" Jade threw her hands up in anger as she stormed over to lean against one of the lockers near Tori's.

"Maybe we just go? she's probably just at home?" Andre asked, noticing the tension was beginning to creep through the group. "He's right, I mean we do have that big homework assignment she probably just wanted an early start on it" Beck added, as usual being the calming voice of reason in the group, "yeah, and well... that is the only time she doesn't really pay attention to her phone" Andre told them. "great now can we please get out of here?" Jade pretty much demanded as she stormed toward the door, the boys all following her, "you coming Tori?" Andre asked noticing she hand't quite moved yet.

"I suppose you're right" she thought aloud as she hurried along to catch up with the rest of them, "I just hope she's okay"

* * *

 ***Cat's P.O.V***

"Please make sure your seat belts are fastened, we will be departing in 5 minutes" the voice of the captain came over the speaker, the stewardesses began doing there usually safety routine instructing passengers what to do in the case of an emergency, but I had heard it one too many times to care so I simply stared out of the window and let the sounds drown out behind my thoughts.

 _What will I do when I land?_ That's a far few hours away from now so I figure I've got plenty of time to figure it all out, I'm sure I can get a cab from the airport to a hotel right? London can't be that different.

 _Where will I sleep?_ I just told you, a hotel.

 _How much will it cost?_ Oh... well now there's where I start to fly off the rails because I only have a certain amount of money to my name and no way to earn any more just yet, but I'm sure it'd be enough for a week or two? I hope.

 _Should I get a job?_ I mean I doubt I'd be able to go to school, I doubt I'd even want to go to school so why not, I guess I could find something reasonable I suppose?

 _What if I can't find a job?_ Then I sleep at the airport? maybe someone will help me out?

 _What if they don't let me sleep at the airport?_ Well... I guess... outside?

 _So, I'm homeless now?_ No Cat, you... WE, are not homeless, we can do this.

 _But you just said-_ I know what I said, just trust me on this alright.

 _Okay,_ Thank you.

The engines began to whir and the "fasten seat belt" sign lit up, everyone began making sure they were seated correctly and that they're children or friends were too, the wheels began to turn and the plan slowly began to move, picking up speed as it moved toward the runway, where it began to pick up even more speed and pretty soon it was barreling down the runway, I kept my eyes out the window watching it all move by and gradually the wheels started to lift off the floor and the plane rose higher and higher, eventually to the point we were high enough to see the city of Hollywood, the sun was going down by now so all the street lights were on and various other lights glistened within the skyline, it was a beautiful sight and it reminded me of home... _Oh god what if I've made a terrible mistake? I already miss my friends, and my family and my bed, I want to go home!_ Calm down Cat we'll be okay, I think...

Nerves were beginning to creep to the surface now, I could feel the tears slowly sliding down my cheeks as I stared out of the window, not shifting my eyes at all, locked on the lights down below in the city, that slowly began to blur as tears filled my eyes.  
I watched for as long as I could, seeing the lights drift get smaller and smaller, drifting and fading away, until they were gone, behind me, my old life was behind me, my friends were behind me, my family was behind me, it was all gone, and to tell you the truth, I was scared, I'm a seventeen year old girl who thought running away and jumping on a plane would be a good idea and that shows just how much of a f*ck up I really am.

My eyes still stared out the window as the barely visible lights drifted away to the point were they were gone, I put my hand on the window and thought to myself "come back" hoping beyond hope that I would suddenly wake up in bed and this would all be just a dream, _I've made a terrible mistake and I want to go home_.

I don't have a home to go back to anymore.

* * *

 **That's all for this chapter, I know its not the longest but its the best I could do at this point in time, I hope you enjoyed it**


	4. London

**Little delay between chapters again, apologies, I may begin trying to upload weekly as it would be easier for when I have some time to write, not really important, any way thank you to those that have read and reviewed thus far I'm glad you're enjoying it and I hope that can continue**

* * *

"This is your captain speaking we will be landing in 5 minutes we hope you enjoyed the flight and will fly with us again in the future"

Realization had finally hit home, what I had done, the choice I had made, the decision I thought was the right one, It was all hitting me now just how wrong I may be.  
I'm thousands of miles from my home, my friends, my family, my bed and it scared me, it wasn't just the voice inside my head that was scared anymore I was too, and I mean really scared, like for my life.  
I had hoped the plane journey would never come to and end, and truth be told it did feel like an eternity, when you're locked inside your own mind tortured by a thousand thoughts all wanting to be addressed at the same time its hard... the minutes felt like hours and the hours felt like days.  
But time stops for no man, or woman in my case and now sure enough we were setting down at the airport in London, it was only about 4pm in London time, I only knew that because the clock on the flight was set to London time to allow everyone to "adapt" in a way to possibly avoid jet lag, but it probably wouldn't work.  
Anyway, it was only 4pm but it was completely dark outside, so much so you'd think it were midnight, it was a little unnerving to say the least.

I didn't have any bags so I managed to quickly slip off the plane and avoid the crowds of people attempting to get their stuff from the overhead compartment, I quickly headed from the plane to the terminal, I don't know why though I could have stayed on the plane and explained my problem to a stewardess and maybe they could help me get home, but my legs just seemed to be carrying themselves at this point and even if I wanted to stop... no... I wanted to stop, I couldn't.

I kept on walking until I was near the entrance, I looked around at all the people filing in and out, surely I could ask someone for help? there are security guards, people who work here, so many people that can help me but instead I choose not to say a word.  
Before heading out however I did stop to ask a young man, only a few years older than me where the nearest hotel was.  
"Sure sweetheart, just go out that door, take a left, follow it down, take your third right and then go five blocks and you'll get to the nearest hotel no problem, it'll be no more than twenty minutes" "thank you very much" I said with a gracious smile to him before heading off toward the exit, repeating his steps over in my head, part of me wanted to laugh at his funny British accent, but before I could I walked through the automatic sliding doors out on to the street and froze.

By froze I mean actually froze in place as the sharpest gust of cold air immediately hit me, it sent shivers through to my bones, it was so unimaginably cold, I knew from social media that Britain was well known for its bad weather but I didn't think it was this bad, and to make matters worse the rain was pouring down, which is weird because as I landed there wasn't any sign of rain but now it was like it had been raining for a good few hours.  
I had no choice but to fold my arms and attempt to keep what little body heat I had left to hold me over as I began walking, again I have no idea why, I know full well I'm scared and I don't want to be here and most importantly I want to go home but its like my body wouldn't let me.

NO! I mentally yelled just before I stepped from under the shelter in to the rain, spinning on my heels I quickly walked back in to the airport and headed straight to the customer service desk.  
"Hi how can I help you?" the man behind the desk asked, looking me over, _was it just me or was every British man handsome?_ now isn't the time Cat.  
"I was um, just wondering if um... when is the next flight to America?" I asked with a stern expression, but inside I felt like doing back flips, thinking that by the time this was all over I'd be safe at home in my bed.  
"Not for at least two days I'm afraid" WHAT?!  
"What?" I tried my best not to yell, "Yeah, there's none going today and the weather will be really bad tomorrow so we've been advised against flights, so you'll have to check back then" he explained.  
"Oh okay, well... can you tell me how much it'll be?" I asked counting up the money I had, it was about 1300 dollars, I thought for sure I'd have enough, especially if i convert it to British currency.  
He typed into the computer and looked back at me with a frown "its sold out I'm afraid" oh great.  
"You're not from around here are you?" he asked questioning my accent, "no I'm trying to get home" "well there's a hotel not far from here you can stay there for a few days and the flight at the end of the week will be £575" "okay, thank you" guess I was going out in the rain after all.

With no choice left I figured I may as well get my money converted and then go and stay at the hotel until the end of the week, at least then it'd give me a chance to think and it'd give my so called friends and family a chance to miss me.  
After my 1300 dollars had been converted into 846 pounds I- EIGHT HUNDRED AND FOURTY SIX POUNDS? I mentally screamed in shock at the difference, that was barely more than the flight cost I thought I'd have more not less, I... wait... that's the other way around... oh my goodness... way to go stupid.  
This is going from bad to worse already I thought to myself getting the money together and heading out to face the blistering cold again, I didn't even have a jacket on, I packed clothes but I didn't bring my big winter coat with me because I didn't think I'd need it, I'm so bad at making decisions.  
The sharp chill of the cold air hit me again taking my breath away, this time I didn't stop, walking straight out.  
If the cold air was bad, the cold rain was even worse, it came down so harshly, within minutes I was soaked through to my skin but I didn't stop.

Along the way I noticed people from London were different to the people back home in America, even on a horrible day like this when you walked down the street, complete strangers would smile, say hello, even pay you a compliment, but here its like nobody said a word, they all just kind of looked down or in front of them, almost like nothing else was important enough to pull them from whatever it is they were doing, but the few times someone did look at me, and even in my state I managed a smile it was just met with a scowl or an immediate averting gaze, they all saw I had no jacket on in the freezing cold and the pouring rain but no one did a thing to help me.

I made it to the hotel, surprisingly without drowning or succumbing to frostbite would you believe.  
I walked over to the front desk, shivering and dripping, the man at the desk looked at me and immediately stood up, finally it seemed like someone was going to help me, "what the hell were you thinking going out in that weather dressed like that?" he asked getting a towel from a cabinet and handing it to me, I couldn't even speak I was so cold, my lips were turning blue and even when I tried to speak my shivering made it impossible to understand.  
"Come on we need to get you dried off" he said leading me through to the room behind the front desk, he helped me dry off as best I could, sat me down and gave me one of the hotels complimentary robes.  
He even bought me a cup of hot chocolate, I was in shock at how nice he was.

"Are you okay honey?" he asked after leaving me for a while to drink my hot chocolate, which was SO good by the way, I nodded with my body temperature back from freezing, "I am now, thank you"  
"Where were you going?" "Here actually" I told him.  
"Well, do you know where your parents are?" he asked, and that's when I realized he thought I was a lost little girl, which is understandable given my height.  
"N... no I'm actually from America I was going to see if I could stay here for a few nights before heading back"  
"Ohh..." he nodded listening to me explain, "I thought you'd got lost or something" I smile and told him that wasn't the case at all, but I didn't tell him just why I had ended up here in the first place.

"Well, if a bed to sleep in is what you're looking for you've come to the right place, but we charge for the week" he told me, I thought that was no problem however.  
"Its £300" for the week, that includes food and drink, I smiled and nodded, paying him and he led me up to my room, finally things were looking up.  
"Here you go, I'll let you get settled, you'll probably want to take a shower, call down if you need anything" "thank you so much" "don't mention it honey" "I'm Cat by the way" "lovely to meet you Cat I'm Derrick" he smiled and left, what a nice man, _and handsome too, just like every other British man I've spoken too, either I'm lucky or they're all like that,_ Not now Cat, but you're right he is.

I smiled feeling like a trapped soul that was finally free, letting myself lay down on the bed, this is perfect, I can stay here for the week, and he was right I did want to shower first, see the sights, look around, meet people, try the food like fish and chips and tea and crumpets and stuff, I sound so British haha, and then I can get the flight back, I- hang on... how much was the flight?

With fear taking over my thoughts again I quickly jumped from the bed and went to my bag, remembering what the man at the airport said, the flight would be £575 but I had paid £300 for the week at the hotel, and I had... £846...

Oh my god I don't have enough money for the flight home.

* * *

 **Oh dear, what will little Cat do now?**

 **I hope you enjoyed this chapter I'll hopefully have the next one up by next week**


	5. Regret

**Little delay once more between chapters, I've been on the busy side but I have time free now so I figured I'd try and get a new chapter out**

* * *

I don't have enough money to get home... what am I going to do? I miss my bed I miss my mom I miss my dad I miss my friends I... I WANT TO GO HOME!  
I knew what was coming, I could feel it coming, my eyes were filling and soon the hot tears were spilling over and down across my cheeks, I was so scared. I had never been this scared before, like we all get scared I know but this was so far beyond normal fear, this was cataclysmic.  
All I could do in this moment of powerlessness was throw myself down on the bed, bury my head in the pillow and sob, terrified, wanting nothing more than to go home.  
Okay... I'm going to close my eyes and when I open them I'll be home okay? okay... its not working!  
"Mom...Dad...Tori...Jade...I wanna go home...I want my mom...I want my dad..."  
By this point I was pretty much throwing a full blown tantrum, I was screaming into the bed in between loud painful sobs, repeating the same few words over and over in my mind "I want to go home" I felt so helpless, so defenseless, so scared and so alone.

Then, I heard a few knocks at the door, I froze on my bed, THE bed, this is not my bed... "who is it?" I asked feeling another heavy sob trying to push its way out.  
"Cat its me Derrick" I slowly rolled over and got off the bed, wiping my eyes eagerly in an attempt to conceal the fact I was crying, but it just made it worse making them all red and puffy, and the makeup running down my cheeks wasn't exactly helping either.  
I opened the door and looked down at the floor, "can I come in for a moment?" he asked so I simply moved aside to let him, "I'm sure you're hungry so I thought you could use a meal" he said pushing a trolley into the room, turning to look at me as I hadn't yet moved from the door, still staring at the floor.

"You okay there?" he asked coming over to me, "I thought you were going to have a shower and relax? I mean no offense but... you do need it" I looked up at him, managing the slightest of smiles at his little remark, and as our eyes met he realized I had been crying, he took some tissues from the trolley and came over handing them to me, putting his hand on my shoulder.  
I clutched the tissues tightly and pressed them into my eyes, feeling powerless I sobbed and pretty much collapsed into him, sobbing loudly into his chest, he put his arms around me and held me close, "Cat? what's wrong?" he asked, "I... want... to... go... home" my breathing was really fast and I let out another loud sob as I said the word 'home', holding onto him for dear life.

"Okay... okay... don't worry, sit down" his voice was soothing and he led me over to the bed and sat me down, getting down on a knee in front of me, I sat before him like a helpless little girl, clutching the now balled up tissue like my life depended on it.  
"What's got you so upset sweetheart?" he asked looking me in the eyes with his hand on my knee, "I miss my home" I said biting my tongue to keep yet another sob inside.  
"Well its not like you're trapped here is it? you'll see them again, why don't you give them a call?" "Because... I...I... forgot my phone..." "Really? a teenage girl forgot her phone? I find that hard to believe" I giggled a little but it was quickly taken over by you guessed it, another sob.  
"You'll be okay Cat, you've got a roof over your head, a bed to sleep in, three meals a day, we'll take care of you, you're in London after all, one of the busiest cities on the planet, curled up in bed crying is not the best way to spend time here you know" I suppose he's right.  
"You've just had a rough day, how about you have something to eat, have a nice hot shower and get some sleep? see how you feel tomorrow? if you really do want nothing more than to go home, I'll do everything in my power to help get you there" "there um... there aren't any flights for um... two days" I felt myself dangerously close to bursting into tears again and he reached up to wipe a stray tear that had just crept over my eyelid and gently ran down to my cheek.  
"Well... that gives you a day to explore London, I'll get you a car to take you anywhere you want to go" "but... I don't have enough money for the ticket" "Cat... its my job to ensure our guests enjoy themselves, and you crying your heart out is... well bad for business and... painful to watch, and like I said I'll do whatever I can to help get you back home so don't worry about the money, it'll be okay I promise"  
He stood up and went over to the trolley, "I thought you needed a proper British welcome so..." he lifted the cover to reveal a plate of fish & chips, honestly that excited me, "you eat this, have a shower and get yourself some sleep, if you need anything I'm downstairs honey I promise"  
I stopped him at the door and gave him a hug, "thank you..." "my pleasure"

The door closed and I heard him head off down the hall, I turned around and looked over at the trolley, or more importantly the meal, I sat at the foot of the bed in front of it, added a little salt, and dug in.  
Before I knew it I was laying back looking at the ceiling with a full stomach and a much better outlook on life, its amazing how food can do that, and what a meal it was, I see now why its a traditional British dish... its fantastic.  
Now I think I should have a shower, I know I need it.

I left my clothes discarded on a chair, not sure how I was going to get them clean, or what I was going to do as I didn't have a bag but... I could have sworn I left the house with one?  
The door knocked and I quickly threw a robe on and went to answer it, it was Derrick and he was holding that bag I knew I had when I left but must have forgotten it.  
"I believe this is yours?" he asked as I let him in, "where did you find it?" I asked "the airport called, they said they had an unclaimed bag with a name tag on it, that name was yours, they always call us first since we're the closest hotel, so I went over to pick it up for you"  
"Thank you so much" I exclaimed excitedly taking the bag and opening it, the first thing I saw was my stuffed giraffe, something I couldn't help but hug tightly.  
"Looks like you enjoyed the meal" he said with a laugh, I just nodded my head, watching him collect everything back on the trolley and get ready to take it back downstairs, "I'm glad, oh and we can wash those clothes for you too"  
I once again waved him off and heard him head down the hall, this time I locked the door and headed through to the en suite bathroom for a much needed shower.

The second I stepped underneath the warm, running water I felt a wave of sensation take over my body and I froze, standing there just letting the water run over me, as if it were washing my stress and my troubles away, sheer bliss.  
After my heavenly shower I settled myself down in a nice warm bed and let myself drift off to sleep, knowing tomorrow would be a new day.

* * *

 ***No P.O.V***

"You guys I'm really worried about Cat" Tori sighed sitting down for lunch, looking at the empty space to her right that Cat would no doubt be sitting in.  
"Why? she's missed a few days of school before" Jade gave a half hearted response while typing out a text message, "Beck's not here and I'm not worried" she said now reasoning with the worried Tori.  
"Yeah but... we didn't see her at all after lunch yesterday and now she's not at school, what if she's hurt?" Tori asked, sending a little shiver down the spine of the usually tough as nails Jade, she was always the tough, cold heart of the group, but not even she could deny the charm and love that seemed to radiate off that special girl with the red hair.  
"Tori, you're worried over nothing, Cat's probably at home in bed, she'll be fine" Andre tried to reason with her now, "are you sure?"  
"How about you just leave it until the end of the day, if she still hasn't been in touch we'll go to her house? see if she's alright?" Tori nodded at the idea, giving her phone a nervous glance, "I guess..." she sighed putting it away.

The final lesson to end the day was a dull, quiet one, usually there would be at least three outbursts from Cat telling everybody a crazy story about herself or her brother in some unimaginable situation, like being stabbed by a clown on the bus, who knew what went on inside her mind.  
After class Tori eagerly checked her phone while she headed for her locker, nothing, no texts, no missed calls.  
"Where are you Cat..." she sighed to herself typing out another text message, scrolling up reading through the texts she had sent her since yesterday.

"Hey Cat, where are you? we got an A on our film! and we were gonna get sushi to celebrate but we're waiting on you"

"Cat? Jade is getting tired of waiting for you, where are you? call me!"

"Cat come on... answer your phone!"

"Cat what's wrong? I know you and I know you'd never go this long without answering your phone, please call me"

"We're heading to get sushi now, meet us there"

"Really Cat? we spent two hours there and you still haven't texted or called me? what's going on?"

"Cat, I'm really worried about you, you haven't answered any of my texts today, please text me when you get the chance Cat, please"

"I'm going to bed now, hopefully I'll wake up to a text from you, goodnight Cat 3"

"Morning... still nothing from you? you're really starting to scare me Cat"

"I'm headed to school now, hopefully I'll meet you there?"

"Cat I'm at school by your locker, where are you?"

"Cat call me please"

"Cat!"

"Cat where are you?!"

"Cat... I'm scared"

"Cat I'm coming over to your house to make sure you're okay"

That was the last message, the one Tori had just sent, she put her phone in the back pocket of her jeans and closed her locker, heading off to go find Jade.  
"Jade you ready to go?" "go? go where?" "Cat's house? remember?" "oh, right I have homework to do" Jade said closing her locker, "Okay, Andre? Robbie? you coming?"  
"I can't I need to finish this new song by Friday" Andre said, "and my grandmother needs help with her computer" Robbie said.  
"So none of us have heard a thing from Cat since yesterday and you're not at all worried? you're just going to carry on with your lives like its all okay? what if she's not?" Tori felt herself getting angry so she stormed off before any of them could even reply.

She walked out putting her jacket on since it was a little cold, she crossed her arms tightly and began to walk, looking over her shoulder hoping one of, if not all three of Jade, Andre and Robbie would have come after her, but no one did, she shook her head and just carried on walking.

She arrived at Cat's house and noticed the light in Cat's bedroom was on, she breathed a huge sigh of relief and went over to knock the door.  
"Hi Mr. Valentine is Cat home? she wasn't at school today and I just wanted to check she was okay"  
"I don't know Tori, she's locked herself in her room and she won't come out, she wont even say a word" he explained, Tori looked at him with a concerned stare, getting more and more worried by the minute.  
"Can I... talk to her?" she asked and he stepped aside to let her in "please, come in" he said so she walked in, shutting the door behind her.

Tori went upstairs and stopped at the door which said "Cat's room" in pink letters, she took a deep breath and knocked the door, but didn't get an answer, so she tried again but still no answer.

"Cat, its me Tori, can you open the door please?... I don't know what happened or if everything is okay but I really want to help Cat, please open the door... if not could you at least say something so I know you're there? I'm really worried about you" Tori kept her hand pressed against the door, fighting back the tears.

"I hope you're okay Cat"  
But what Tori didn't know was on the other side of that door, was an empty room.

* * *

 **That's all for now, what will Tori do? what will Cat do for that matter? I hope you enjoyed it and I hope to get a new chapter out soon**


	6. One Week On

**So I'm back, you know the drill by now, I apologize for the delay between chapters and say I'll hopefully change that next time but next time it's the same thing lol, but regardless I'm here now and I hope you enjoy.**

* * *

 ***No P.O.V***

"It's been a whole week" Tori thought to herself standing in front of Cat's locker, staring at it, every locker at the school was individually designed to allow students to express themselves and Cat's was no different, it had a red rose in the top corner that she would change every week and always be sad when the previous flower had died, but since she hadn't been in Tori took the liberty of changing the rose for Cat, that's actually what led Tori to her locker in the first place.  
The rest of the locker was a collage of pictures, some of Cat and her friends, some of Cat performing, some of others performing, a picture of her stuffed animals here and there, just a nice way to take a trip down memory lane, or for those who didn't know her, to get an understanding of the kind of girl Cat was, someone who liked to share experiences with her friends and loved ones, I mean there was even a picture with Trina safely behind the plastic cover.

Tori looked over the pictures of herself amidst the memory collage, the first picture she and Cat had taken the night after Tori's first day at Hollywood Arts, she and Cat had really hit it off and went to Cat's house to continue the conversation, that's when Tori remembered how bright and colorful Cat's room was, she had been there so many times she could remember every little detail, but now she was just hoping that when she went back the door would be open and Cat would be waiting there.  
Tori looked at another picture, Cat beaming the biggest smile she could possibly have, hugging Tori who looked a little less pleased, with cake all over her face, that was the time Cat planned a surprise party for Tori, and the "surprise" was a face full of cake, Tori giggled a bit remembering how she was scared when everyone yelled "SURPRISE" or how shocked she was when Cat suddenly hit her in the face with a full cake, or how good it tasted, it really did taste good.

She stood for a while going over other pictures of other memories she had with Cat, one on the plane to Yerba, and we all know how that went, a picture of Cat and Tori singing together, that was probably her favorite, Cat said it was her favorite picture with Tori too, the time they all got so hung up on Beck's Canadian friend that they were fighting amongst themselves and constantly forgetting plans made with the boys, but eventually they saw sense and sang them a song to make up for it, which was rather hard to say no to when you think about it.

"Where are you Cat..." Tori thought aloud to herself.  
"I'm right here!" Tori heard that all too familiar high pitched voice filled with happiness behind her and turned around with a huge smile only to be disappointed when she saw it was Jade instead, smirking proudly.  
"Why would you do that?" Tori asked, clearly angry, "relax Vega it's just a joke, but you have to admit I do a pretty good Cat right?" Tori sighed and looked back at the locker, "why hasn't she come back yet? its been a whole week Jade..." Tori trailed off looking at a picture of herself with Cat and the others from that time they went to the beach, sure it didn't start very well but it ended perfectly, they all had fun as the sun went down and on the picture Cat had wrote "the best day of my life with the best people in my life... and Trina"  
"She'll be fine Tori, you have to stop worrying" Jade tried to reason but Tori didn't seem to want to hear it, "are you going to her house again tonight?" she asked and Tori nodded.

"Why are we all at Cat's locker?" Andre asked the pair of girls as he came over, followed by Beck and then Robbie.  
"Tori's worried, again" Jade said, putting emphasis on the word 'again'  
"Tori come on, she'll be okay" Beck said giving her a reassuring shoulder squeeze, which was of course met with a disapproving stare courtesy of Jade, "you going over to her house again after school?" Andre asked and Tori nodded, feeling like she wanted to cry, seeing what was a moment of her cherishing the memories she shared with Cat to having it all shoved aside by others, if only Tori knew that's how Cat felt all the time, disregarded.

"Well, I'm coming with you" Andre said surprising Tori who's eyes lit up as she looked at him, "really?" he nodded and Tori hugged him, giving Andre the perfect opportunity to look over her shoulder at the locker, immediately he saw the same picture Tori did before when they all went to the beach, remembering how Cat had run off to use the bathroom and the rest had wound up trapped in an RV slowly dying because of the rapidly increasing temperature, and also remembering how relieved he was when Cat opened the door, not only because it meant they were finally out of the over sized oven but because Cat had come back and it meant she was alright.

* * *

"You guys aren't the slightest bit worried?" Andre asked between bites of his sandwich, looking at Jade, Beck and Robbie.  
"Well, I'm obviously worried I just know Cat's a big girl, she can handle herself, she'll be okay" "how can you be so sure though?" Andre asked giving Jade something to think about, the other boys sat silently both thinking exactly what Jade was, what if she _wasn't_ okay?  
"She's taken time off school before, we all know she's a sensitive girl, it could be nothing" "but what if it is?" again Andre's question gave them all something to think about.  
"You think we haven't been trying?" Jade asked taking out her phone, "look, I've texted her over and over because I'm worried, of course I am! we all are! just because we're not walking around like we're waiting for the police to find a body does not mean I'm not worried!" Jade was fuming at Andre as she went through countless text messages to Cat.

* * *

"You sure you're not coming with us?" Tori asked Robbie as they headed for the exit, "I can't I have to help my Grandmother" "again? I know she's an elderly but how problematic can one be?" Tori asked with a little chuckle, "you'd be surprised, I'll see you tomorrow" he said as they went their separate ways, Tori met up with Andre who was waiting outside and the pair headed over to Cat's house.  
"See? her bedroom light is on, its been on every time I've come here" Tori said as they approached the house, knocking on the door.  
"Oh, hello again Tori, back for another try?" Mr. Valentine asked her, Tori sighed a little as she didn't like how humorous he was toward the situation, it was his daughter after all.  
Once again though she was let in along with Andre and the pair headed upstairs, stopping outside the door that had "Cat's room" on it, wondering what was on the other side.

"Cat, its me again... Tori" she sighed knocking on the door, hoping that she would hear Cat's voice, or at least some movement, but nothing, she pressed her ear against the door and knocked again "Cat I'm really worried about you, please tell me you're okay" but again it was silence.  
"Cat she's not the only one..." Andre started giving the door a few knocks "we're all worried, me, Tori, Beck, Jade, Robbie, everyone at school, all the teachers, your parents, my parents, Tori's parents, I could go on and on, we all want you to be okay Cat" yet still it was silence.

Tori slowly put her hand on the door handle and considered the options, she knew Cat hated people barging into her room and Tori had done exactly that before when Cat was mad and it just made things worse, but at the same time Tori would take an argument with Cat over not hearing anything from Cat, at least then she'd know she was okay, and alive.

She exchanged a look with Andre and gripped the handle "Cat, if you don't talk to me... I'm going to open the door..." Tori said once again knocking the door, holding onto the slim shred of hope she had left, but still it was silent.  
"Okay Cat... I'm coming in" Tori held her breath and went to turn the handle, but the door was locked, effectively ruining that idea.

* * *

 ***Cat's P.O.V***

"Its been a whole week..." a whole week since I walked out of my school, went home, packed a bag, went to the airport and got on a plane, and it had been one of the best weeks of my life, I mean there were a few ups and downs, every now and then I'd get nervous and scared that I was alone and I'd want to go back but gradually I was getting better at dealing with them and I was embracing this new chapter in my life more.

I'm in the elevator heading down to the lobby, like I said it's been a week and that's how long I paid for right? so I'm guessing this is the bit where I tell you I managed to come up with the money and I have my plane ticket in hand and I'm off to the airport to go home right? no, that isn't what's happening, not every story has a happy ending.

Honestly I had no idea what I was going to do, I had toyed with an idea in my mind and I did still have some money, but not enough to get home, but maybe I'm not planning on going home?

I mean... I am still scared, I have woken up in the middle of the night and cried because I miss my home, and my friends and my family but they are all part of the reason I ended up in this position in the first place so why would I just want to go back to it? would it all just magically change? again, not every story has a happy ending.

My time in London however had been wonderful, I had seen so many great things, I had met so many great people, Derrick in particular who had been such a help, he would always be the one to bring my breakfast up in the morning, and ways always the one bringing lunch and dinner too, if I were eating at the hotel that is, sometimes I'd eat elsewhere like at a restaurant, or buy some fish and chips from a local "takeaway" at least that's what British people call it, and the sights too... Big Ben, The London Eye, Tower Bridge, and so many more, even something as simple as an old phone booth was magical to me, and it was so cool to see new things and learn new things too.

And of course I had been trying to find work to help me come up with the money to get home, but the more I tried to find a job, and the more I went to an interview only to be told I was "too young and inexperienced" the more I weighed up other options.

The ding of the elevator snapped my thoughts and as soon as the doors opened I had the idea planted firmly in my mind, it was the choice I was making and I wasn't going to let anyone stop me, its kind of like when you can't decide on something so you flip a coin and while the coin is in the air you immediately know what you want, that's how I felt, as soon as I had little to no time to think about it it became clear to me.

"Hi Cat, is this is then are you off?" Derrick asked as I went over to the desk, I had learned a lot about him while I was here, I mean he was handsome obviously but he was like ten years older than I was, and he had a girlfriend anyway, and even had two kids, I had the chance to meet them too and they were just how you'd expect his two sons to be, just little versions of him.

I don't know what I was expecting, would I fall madly in love with a hotel worker, get married and have kids and spend the rest of my life in London? seems a bit out there even by my standards, but I was glad I had met him and I was happy he was at such a wonderful place in his life.

"No, actually I was hoping I could pay for another week?" I put the money down and could clearly see the surprise in his face  
"Really? I thought you wanted to go home?" "I did, and I do, but I've still got a lot to learn, I'd love to spend some more time here" "and what about when that week ends?" "well, I've been trying to find work, hopefully I can by then" I explained to him, he nodded and paused for a moment, "tell you what... if this really is one hundred percent what you want, I'll let you stay for the month but don't tell anyone okay?" WOW! this was even better than I had hoped it would go, that would give me so much time to work everything out, surely I could find a job by then.

"Really? thank you so much" I said happily, "my pleasure, you've come a long way from the sobbing girl who was pleading to go home just a few nights ago" he laughed a little and honestly I did too, I was glad that was behind me.  
"I'm just heading out for a walk I won't be long" I said turning to walk out "enjoy, and I guess I'll see you soon since you're not going anywhere anytime soon"

I turned and headed for the door with a smile on my face, I was getting stronger, I was becoming independent, I was beginning to tell myself I didn't need home rather than just question it.

And as I walked out the door I let my thoughts become words.

"I'm never going back"

* * *

 **Well... Well... Well... what is Cat thinking now then? will this be a good idea? will it be a bad one? how will she get home with no money if she decides in the end that that is what she wants? will Tori and the rest of her friends ever find out just where she is?**

 **I hope you enjoyed and I hope to bring another chapter to you soon**


	7. A Mile In Her Shoes

**And we're back, and let me just say happy new year :) and I hope you've all had a happy Christmas and if you don't celebrate Christmas then a happy holiday nonetheless, its good to be back now and I've had time over the break to come up with a few new ideas about where to take this, so without further ado lets get right back to it**

* * *

 ***No P.O.V***

Tori headed in to school on another morning on another day, hoping it would be different but like every day before it since Cat left, she was sure she would be disappointed.  
And just as she had played the scenario over in her mind a hundred times on the way to school, it was unfolding exactly how she knew it would, she went in to school, to Cat's locker, removed the rose that had died and replaced it with a new one, even though it was becoming a natural series of events now, to walk in expecting to see Cat and be disappointed when she didn't... Tori couldn't help but always have that slight sense of optimism that today might be different, but so far it was looking like just the same.

The morning was no different, Tori found herself standing in front of Cat's locker for longer than she did her own, almost lost in the crowds of students that filed through the halls, passing her by without so much as a second glance, to them it wasn't the case of "it was like Cat never left" it was more like "Cat had never been there in the first place" none stopped to ask Tori if she was okay, or if she had heard anything about Cat, or if she had seen her, or anything for that matter, they all just walked straight by her, even Tori's friends were perplexed by her behaviour, they were all worried for Cat too but as far as they were all concerned she was just at home in her room with the door locked, it had been almost a month since Cat vanished into thin air and rather than heighten the worry amongst her friends, time seemed to be moving past the girl who felt so alone it drove her out of the country itself.

Class, just like the morning was no different, Tori went in expecting to see the familiar bright red hair and ever present smile sitting in the seat at the front, beside the seat Tori would always sit in, but as usual nothing was there, the seat was taken by someone else entirely, everyone knew it was Cat's seat but it was like nobody cared.  
Tori took a seat toward the back of the class, she didn't like sitting next to "Cat's chair" as she'd always find herself distracted staring at the empty seat, picturing in her mind Cat sitting right there, jumping up to tell the class some random predicament she had found herself in over the weekend, to Cat it seemed like every time she told a story like that nobody listened, but they did, her friends did, especially Tori, and the more time went on without a story like that from the girl who seemed to brighten up even the darkest days, the more her friends missed her.

Lunch time, same old same old, Tori and her friends sat at the same table, everyone there, minus one, as it had become, they'd talk about her, in the slightest hope that something may have changed, but it was always exactly the same, nothing new, nothing better, Tori would spend time at lunch sending Cat text messages and attempting to call her, but the same message she received every time had become enough to move her to tears, the message that meant Cat's phone was off, and the fact it had been off for this long just made Tori worry more and more, sometimes it was like she found herself secluded from the world around her, her sole focus being the safety of Cat, feeling alone in her conquest, hoping beyond hope someone would offer her a hand and stand by her through it.  
The same way Cat needed it, but it never came.

And after school was the same too, Tori would walk down to Cat's house, see the bedroom light on, attempt to call Cat, and text her, but never got an answer, knock on the front door, go up to Cat's room, and try as she might she would never hear anything on the other side, she thought about kicking the door down but then thought she probably couldn't even manage it, but she knew she had to try something, standing in front of the door with her fists clenched tightly she thought long and hard about it, she had been told by her dad the correct way to kick a door in, check the hinges to make sure it opens away from you, if not kicking it down will be just about impossible, and kick close to the lock, not the lock directly, and most importantly follow through with the kick, don't ease up once you make contact.

3...2...1... "what are you doing?" but just before Tori could kick the door she was stopped by Jade, much to Tori's surprise, she had never once came over with Jade to Cat's house, Jade never even mentioned it ever, at least with the others they told Tori they'd go with her, and they all tried to no avail.  
"Jade?" Tori asked surprised as Jade put her hand on the door handle and attempted to open it, no surprise it was locked.  
"Cat? are you there? its me, Jade... its been nearly a month Cat, no matter what the problem is I promise if you let us in and you let us help you it will go away" Tori watched silently as Jade wiped a tear away, "Cat I miss you... you understand me like no one else does, I feel safe with you, I can tell you anything... I miss that... I need that... I... I need my best friend back"

* * *

 ***Cat's P.O.V***

"I'm sorry Miss Valentine but you're just not what we're looking for" I can't even be bothered to read the rest of this email, I know its just another rejection notice, and its obviously the same excuse "you're too young, not enough experience, blah blah blah" how can I get the experience in the first place if no one offers me the chance?

I looked around online for a while for a few more job offerings, at this moment in time I'd take just about anything, I knew time was against me, it was almost the end of the month and unless I could pull a few hundred pounds out of thin air I wouldn't have a place to stay.  
I sat there in the library for what felt like hours sending off email after email and application after application, I checked the time and it was about half seven, it was dark out, well it had been since about four in the afternoon anyway, so I figured I may as well head back, knowing I've got less than a week now to land a job somehow.

I headed out, folding my arms tightly around my chest to keep myself warm as I began to walk down the street, it wasn't far from the hotel so I didn't need to worry about a car or anything, but I couldn't shake the thoughts from my mind, what was I going to do? where was I going to sleep? how was I going to get home? did I want to go home? did I even want to carry on living?

"Excuse me miss" a deep voice from behind me pulled me from my thoughts, I spun on my heels to see a man, taller than me, but then again who isn't really? he looked rather shady, dressed in all black with a large coat on, and a hood covering most of his face, even though it wasn't raining.  
"Um, can I help you?" I asked nervously as the man walked over, "I couldn't help but notice you back there" he signalled down the road, obviously meaning the library, was he watching me? and following me? I could feel my body tense up and the fear run through me as I thought of a thousand and one scenarios that could happen.

"I see you're looking for work?" wait, could he possibly be trying to help me? "I... am" I was still nervous and pretty much couldn't control it, "how old are you?" he asked with his eyes wandering over me, "um, 17... sir" I don't know why I called him sir but I was trying my hardest to make a good impression and to not make him mad as I had no idea what he might do, "a young one eh? I might just be able to help you out" he said reaching into his pocket, for some reason I thought he was going to pull out a gun, but instead it was just a notepad and a pen, he quickly wrote something down and ripped the page off and handed it to me, it was a phone number.

"if you need work we might just be able to help you out, give that number a call" I nodded feeling a wave of excitement now as I thought this was essentially my ticket to safety, "what kind of work is it?" I asked, he laughed a little "the right kind for a girl like you, young, cute, eager to learn, with my help there will be a line of people a mile long for you, and you'll be making good money for it too, if you're good that is" he said with another little laugh, blatantly looking over my body once more "and I bet you are..."

Something over my shoulder caught his eye and he immediately wrapped it up "I gotta go sweetheart, remember, if you need work, we can give it to you, call that number" before I could reply he took off down the alleyway, I folded the paper up and put it in my pocket, turning around I saw two police officers walking right toward me, was that what he saw? I mean he did look a shady character... and he didn't really tell me what the job entailed... and he ran from the cops? I don't know if I'd be wise to trust this guy.

"Are you alright there ma'am?" one of the officers asked me as they got closer, "I'm fine officer" "who was that you were talking to?" "he was just asking for directions" I'm not sure why I was lying to the police but it seemed like the easiest option at the time, they exchanged a look and then back to me "well, if you see that man again, don't talk to him, he's dangerous" that sent a shiver down my spine, who was he? what had he done? what does he do? so many questions I wanted to ask but I was too scared to do so.

"Okay officers" "do you need a lift home?" "no thank you, I'm staying at the hotel down the street" "okay, well make sure you go straight there, and remember what we told you" "I will, thank you" "have a good night ma'am" "you too, bye" with that I headed off, walking as quickly as I could back to the hotel, so many thoughts flying around my head, and I still had the piece of paper with a phone number in my pocket, what was I going to do? he said he could help me find work but the police said he was dangerous, but what if its my only option?

* * *

 ***No P.O.V***

"Cat open the door..." Jade again pleaded, but it was no use, she turned around and collapsed into Tori, hugging her tightly as she sobbed into her chest "why wont she come out?" Jade asked clutching Tori as tightly as she could, Tori hadn't seen Jade so upset before, she had seen her sad before and she had even seen her cry before but never like this.  
"I don't know Jade..." Tori couldn't think of anything else to say, "I want her to come out" "me too Jade" Tori felt herself on the verge of tears as she looked at the door, still toying with the idea of kicking it down.

After a few minutes of holding one another Jade finally eased her grip on Tori and turned back to the door, trying a few times to open it but not getting any results, Tori could see the fear in Jade's eyes as tears ran down her cheeks as she desperately tried to open the door.

"Jade that's enough... let go..." Tori took Jade's hand away from the door handle and held it close, "she'll be okay, we can try again tomorrow" Tori reassured her, still wanting to kick the door but thinking better of it.

Jade on the other hand wasn't ready to accept defeat but felt like she had no choice, again hugging Tori tightly and sobbing into her chest.

To both girls surprise they heard a slight thud on the other side of the door, they quickly exchanged a look and both knocked the door, yelling out "Cat!" hoping to hear her.

"Alright that tears it!" Jade yelled surprising Tori, "move!" she yelled again pretty much throwing Tori out of the way, taking a few steps back.

"Cat! this is your final chance! if you don't open this door right now I'm kicking it down! understand?"

"I'm going to count to five and then I'm coming in there whether you like it or not!" Tori watched from beside the door as Jade began to count

"One..." nothing

"Two..." nothing

"Three..." nothing

"Four..." nothing

"Five!" Jade yelled and without warning went straight for the door, kicking with all her might, the door swung open and Jade stood in the doorway in silence, Tori quickly moved behind her to get a look over her shoulder

But at that moment their worst nightmares became a reality as they realised

The room was empty.

* * *

 **Well, well well... I hope you enjoyed that :)**

 **Until next time**


	8. Last Chance

**And we're back**

 **Once again, huge apologies for the almost month long wait between chapters, my laptop seems to be on its last legs and constantly needs rebooting, for now though I'll have to make do with that**

 **And also there are other things occupying most of my time as of late so every time I consider doing some writing something keeps me from it**

 **But nevertheless, thank you for being patient with me and I hope you enjoy**

* * *

 ***No P.O.V***

"She's not in here" Jade said, in a defeated tone, "what the hell do you mean she's not in here?" Tori yelled following Jade into the room, they had both seen that the room was 'empty' from the door way but even then there was still hope, maybe Cat had been hiding in the closet or the bathroom or even under her bed, but the more the girls looked and didn't find anything, the more the optimism drained out of them.

"How could we be so f*cking stupid!" Jade yelled sitting down on Cat's bed, which had been left unattended for so long it was beginning to gather a thin layer of dust, as was everything else in Cat's room, Jade looked at Cat's pillow, imagining her laying there in bed sound asleep as peaceful as ever, remembering all the times Jade had spent the night at Cat's with the pair forced to share a bed, Jade would act as though she didn't want to and tried to push Cat out but inwardly she always wanted Cat to push back a little and stay with her, and every time Jade woke up before Cat she'd watch Cat sleep, so peacefully and so beautiful, for a minute anyway before she'd yell and wake Cat up screaming.

With tears in her eyes and clenched fists Jade grabbed the pillow and threw it aside, hitting Tori in the face who herself was lost in thought looking around Cat's room, remembering all the time she had spent here with Cat, practicing songs, writing homework, rehearsing a dance routine or a play routine, sharing a laugh, cuddling, spending the night together and everything else, Tori even remembered the time she and Cat spent a good five hours playing monopoly together, well I mean with the way Cat absolutely destroyed Tori and left her bankrupt, how could she forget?

"Thanks for that" Tori giggled holding the pillow in her hands, she could smell Cat on it and she found herself lost in a bit of a daze once more holding the pillow, but when she looked at Jade she saw someone who really needed a friend, Jade was sitting in silence with tears and makeup running down her face.  
Tori quickly moved to sit beside Jade on the bed, leaving the pillow across both of their laps, putting her arm around Jade who for the first time in her life, Tori saw genuine fear in, not average "afraid of spiders or afraid of heights" kind of fear, more like a "she might actually be dead" kind of fear, and Tori felt the exact same way, the empty feeling in her stomach and the thoughts rushing through her mind were too much for the girl to handle and she found herself silently hugging Jade as the pair sobbed on Cat's bed

* * *

 ***Cat's P.O.V***

Two days left.

I have two days to land some sort of a job or I'll officially be out of time and will officially be homeless.

Derrick had done his utmost to help me, searching high and low for job openings, sending off applications for me, even putting in a reference on my behalf, but every time we tried we got the same response, "too young, not enough experience, blah blah blah" and it was driving me insane.

The closer the deadline got the more I knew I had to pull something off really f*cking quickly, I was sending off for twice as many jobs as the night before, and twice as many more than that the next day, desperate for some good news.

With 48 hours left I decided to give my emails a check to see if I had heard anything from the countless applications and emails I had sent off.

I looked through all the new emails, and all of them seemed to start off with "thank you for your application Miss Valentine, unfortunately" as of that point there wasn't any worth reading the rest of the email because it would just be another soul crushing rejection.

But to my surprise there was an email in there that was different to the others.

"Dear Miss Valentine, thank you for your application, after examination we believe you would be a suitable candidate for the position in question, please give us a call to arrange an interview as soon as possible, regards, Mrs Davis"

I HAD A CHANCE!

I finally had an opportunity! I mean sure its just working in a supermarket but I don't care! its a job! it pays! with real money! I knew I had to seize this opportunity with both hands and make it count.

I took the number down and headed to the payphone across the street, since I didn't have a phone to use, and Derrick would always give me some change for the phone anyway, especially now that I told him it was to arrange an interview.  
I dialed the number and waited patiently for a response.

"Hello?"

"Hi is this Mrs Davis?"

"Yes, who's calling?"

"It's Cat, Cat Valentine, I sent an application to you and your email said to call as soon as possible"

"Ah of course Miss Valentine how are you?"

"Nervous, how are you?"

"There's nothing to be nervous about dear, we're very pleased with what we've seen and we're about 90% sure you're the right person for the job, the interview is pretty much just a formality"

"Really? wow that's amazing... thank you"

"So do you know when you would like to come in for an interview?"

"As soon as possible I suppose?"

"Okay great, so, half five tonight okay for you?"

"I'll be there"

"I look forward to it Miss Valentine, however you won't be the only one coming for an interview so be sure to bring your A game, there are a limited number of openings and a lot of suitable candidates applying"

"But I thought you said..."

"I know what I said, and just because we believe you're the right person for the job doesn't mean you're the only right person for the job"

"Oh, okay, so five thirty tonight?"

"Yes dear, just tell a member of staff you're here for an interview and they'll point you in the right direction"

"Okay, thank you, bye"

"See you soon Miss Valentine"

With that the phone call ended, I didn't really know what to think, on one hand they said I was "the right person for the job" but on the other I'm not the only person who falls into that category, so chances are there will be people older than me, people with more experience than me, and people smarter than me, but I knew I couldn't let that throw me off, I knew this was my big chance and I had to make it count.

The day went by slowly, I told Derrick about the interview and he helped me go over some techniques and even practice with me on my mannerisms and how I should conduct myself, he helped with my interview outfit too, and even helped print off a resume as well as a written copy of his reference, how nice can one guy be?  
And to top it off, he had arranged for a car to take me to where I needed to go.

The closer I got the more nervous I was, but I kept reassuring myself, thinking about my friends back home and how supportive they would be toward me, telling me what to do.

"Be yourself Cat, its only right that you show them just who you are both inside and outside of the work place, if they like that person you're halfway there already" would be something Tori would no doubt say, always one for confidence in yourself and belief that you're good enough to achieve anything.

"Confidence is key Cat, don't shy away, keep eye contact, smile and answer in full sentences, you need to sell yourself to them" Beck would say, I mean if Mr confidence said it surely it must be true right? he's had countless interviews and he's even been in real movies, only as an extra but still REAL MOVIES.

"Make sure they know exactly what they're hiring when they hire you Cat, not someone else because that'll only end badly, if they don't want to hire who you are then its not the job you want" Jade would tell me, the kind of 'take no prisoners, don't let anyone tell you no, kick the door down and seize the opportunity' kind of person that she is.

And of course my other friends would all have kind helpful words, and the thought of all of these was enough to bring a tear to my eye, but I had to wipe it away since we had arrived.

I headed inside and did what I was told, found a member of staff and told them I was here for an interview, they led me through to the back and told me where to go, I went down to the waiting room expecting to see two maybe three other people applying for the job, instead there were at least ten, and that unnerved me immediately.

I took a seat and waited patiently, I was told to be here for half five and it was five twenty five but all these people were here before me.

I watched the clock on the wall, seconds ticked by, minutes ticked by, I sat there for two whole hours while one by one the applicants went into the interview room and later emerged, I soon realized I was the last person in line so I'd have the biggest task of impressing since they've seen everyone else already before me, and with at least ten people in the waiting room when I arrived, plus the person already having an interview, and who knows how many others had come and gone I knew it was going to be tough.

Finally it was my turn and I was invited into the room.

"Last one?" the woman at the desk asked.

"Yes ma'am" I told her as I took my seat opposite her.

"Ah you must be Cat" I nodded and handed her my resume and the reference, she set them aside for the time being to begin the interview.

After a good twenty five minutes the interview was wrapping up, I felt confident that it had gone well and she was just looking over my resume, and the reference.

"Cat..." she handed me my documents back and looked at me.

"I'm sorry but... its bad news" what? no... really?

This felt like a knife right through my heart, I was so sure I had done a good job, everything seemed right, she liked me, I was confident, I kept eye contact, I answered in full sentences, what did I do wrong?

"Oh, okay, thank you, did I do something wrong?" I asked eager to know

"No no you didn't, its just there were so many applicants and only a few places to go around" so they had already decided on who they would be hiring and I was basically walking into an automatic rejection?

"Okay, well thank you anyway"

"Thank you for your time Cat, you're a bright girl I'm sure you won't have a problem finding a job very soon, I still have your email so if any positions become available I'll personally recommend you for it"

"Thank you" I said standing up, trying my best to hold it together when deep down I just wanted to cry.

The entire car ride back the hotel I spent crying, as soon as I got back I wanted to go straight up to my room.

Heading through the doors Derrick just needed to look at me to know it wasn't good news.

"Cat I'm so-" "I just want to be alone" I said trying my best not to be rude as I went straight for the elevator and up to my room.

I cried and cried to myself thinking what I was going to do, what option did I have left?

And then I remembered, the library, the man, the number, he said he could help me find work.

I went to my jacket and sure enough the piece of paper was still in there, I checked to see if I had any change left and thankfully I did.

On my way back down I had countless thoughts, this man didn't seem like the kind I should trust but at this point in time it feels like the only choice I have, the police told me not to talk to him though... but curiosity had the better of me and I was determined to follow through.

Fortunately Derrick wasn't at the front desk when I went out because I knew he'd want to talk, and I knew his heart was in the right place but I didn't want to stop for anything right now, heading across the road to the payphone, I put the money in and thought long and hard about dialing this number, and what consequences there might be.

But I dialed the number anyway and put the phone to my ear, my heart was pounding as I heard it ringing and ringing, I thought it was going to ring out but then I heard a voice on the other side.

"Hello?"

* * *

 **Well well well, what happens now?**

 **I hope you enjoyed the latest chapter and I hope to be able to bring another one to you soon**


End file.
